During his years as a showbiz writer in Fleet Street, almost 100 of his limericks were published by Express Newspapers. Since then he’s written many more, published in A Limerick Romp Through Time for the first time. He’s even written a few about his local Haywards Heath restaurateurs, Jeremy and his wife Vera:
It has always been Arnie’s ambition
To lure Jeremy out of the kitchen
And buy him some lunch
While watching him munch
(in disguise) on his own tasty chicken
Vera too: on her birthday for example:
‘It’s Vera’s big day!’ shouted Jezza
‘Bring Champagne!’ and a waiter said ‘Yessir!
‘Just a glass or two,
‘For each of you?
‘Or maybe a Nebuchadnezzar?’
It occurred to Arnie that a book of limericks might make good stocking fillers. So, just in time for Christmas, Arnie’s publishers, TSL Publications, are kindly launching A Limerick Romp Through Time (foreword by Peter James). As a double attraction, TSL are also launching a revised version of Arnie’s book of entertaining showbiz tales – Big Name Hunting (foreword by Heston Blumenthal) – with intriguing anecdotes from celebrity interviews with the likes of Terry Wogan, Bo Derek, Buzz Aldrin, Peter Ustinov, Spike Milligan, Dudley Moore and William Shatner … to name but a few!
This review should be penned in verse, rhyme or as a limerick, but being hopeless at such things I must persist in plain, unvarnished prose. Arnie Wilson is a limerick writer of wit and talent – he’s a limericst, is there such an adjective? If not, there should be. His charming little rhymes cover the water-front, from show business to sport, from celebrity, politics and personality, to lines closer to home about his family, loved ones and dear ones. All human life is here, fleeting moments and emotions neatly captured in a few short, very clever lines. As with all good writing, Mr.Wilson’s limericks are easy to read (though I suspect, on occasion, teasingly difficult to compose). They’re fun, they’re often silly and they’re all endlessly entertaining. A compendium of delight and warmth, laced with a knowing, worldly, rascally humour, which perhaps mirrors – in some way – his career in Fleet Street and in television. Buy it. It’s such fun.
There once was a poet called Arnie whose book was full of old blarney
ANOTHER book alert, chums. This one is by Arnie Wilson who worked with Peter Tory and Jeanette Bishop on Peter’s Diary for the Daily Star and was that column’s resident topical limerick writer. And very good his writings were.
This limerick was in response to a minor scandal involving hookers at the Tory Party conference in Blackpool (plus ça change) but, even in the 80s, it was deemed too risqué for publication (oh please!). Today’s fevered climate is far nastier – at least Arnie’s referred to consensual, if monetised, sex.
When a hooker at Blackpool on Sea
Tried to visit a Tory MP
The police said “Alas
Since you haven’t a pass
You can’t enter – and neither can he!”
Arnie’s book of his collected limericks ‘A limerick romp through time’ is out and (plug alert) makes a jolly stocking filler at £4.54 from TSL Publications – https://tslbooks.uk/product/limerick-romp-time-arnie-wilson/
Go on, you know it makes sense – support your fellow hack!
The Daily Drone – 13 November 2017